How Can You Tell if You Run on VM?

  • If you can't get help or even use the help command to explain an error message, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If the idea of a virtual server makes you nervous, then you're probably not on VM
  • If your OS is more of a hindrance than an enabler, then you're probably not on VM
  • If you have to regularly install emergency patches to block security holes in your operating system, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you don't have source code for the OS, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you feel that you're in a maze of twisty little two-letter command passages, all alike, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you think of your dog when you overhear someone referring to REXX, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you're worried about CODE RED virus infections, then you're probably not on VM.
  • Do you have a massive number of colleagues to run your department's server, then you're probably not on VM.
  • Do You see a blue screen at least twice a day, losing all your work, then you're probably not on VM
  • If the idea of running over 41,000 images of Linux on a single footprint could never cross your mind, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you have to schedule machine time on Sunday mornings to test new versions of your operating system then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you've never installed an operating system, had no idea what you were doing, and had it come up perfectly the first time, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If after sending someone a note, you phone them the next day just to check if they got the note; then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you have hundreds of servers, in one county, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you need a screw driver to tear apart your workstation in order to get more memory instead of just issuing DEFINE STOR 256M, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you've never executed a command that completed so fast you weren't sure if it ran correctly, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you can brew a new cup of coffee and have time to drink it before your logon completes its boot or IPL, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you have the help desk phone number memorized, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you talk to level 2 more than your spouse, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If the keys with the most wear and dirt on your key board are Ctrl, Alt, and Delete, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you can use the excuse 'I sent the note, but the e-mail system must have lost it' and get away with it, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you've never forgotten the re-ipl procedures because it has been so long since your system was down, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you stick to one page memos because your system can't handle files a megabyte in size, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you have never used the world's greatest editor, then you're probably not on VM.
  • If you never said, "Gee that was kind of fun", then you're probably not on VM.
  • If your operations staff has the recovery steps memorized because they get lots of practice, then you're probably not on VM.

Many thanks to those who have sent me entries.


The information provided, and views expressed on this site are my own and do not represent the IBM Corporation.



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